Once upon a time, in a land not too far from where you're sitting, a young beagle named Rodeo was unhappy. He had all his heart could ever desire, food, people, cush, but one thing he lacked: True Friendliness. There were no pretty doggies to impress with his handsome figure and melting brown eyes (to melt them with, of course).
The ditzy blonde giant next door didn't count. Moist lips are one thing, endless slobber quite another!
Then, one fine day, Rodeo's family took him on a long journey. When at last they stopped it was growing dark. Rodeo was excited because he could smell rabbits.
Suddenly his heart gave a great leap. Standing before the door of another castle was the most beautiful angel he had ever seen. Tiny, but still quite beautiful. Her name, was Judy-pet.
"Come with me and live at my castle!" he called out to her.
"I haven't taken basic obedience training yet," she said, sitting down to scratch her ear, "so I'm afraid I won't come unless you give me a good reason to."
"Uh..." Rodeo was taken aback. "I have a nice yard? And my family is nice. And the food isn't half bad. And there are two really cushy sofas you can lay on when nobody is looking. Not to mention you can spend all your time with a stylish, handsome, totally lovable beagle boy!"
Judy-pet pricked her ears. "Who?"
"Well, me of course!" cried Rodeo. "Who did you think?"
"Dunno," she shrugged.
Just then Rodeo's family picked up Judy-pet and started to cuddle with her. After a few minutes they set her down.
"Whatever," She said, "your family is nice, so I guess I'll come."
And so Judy-pet became a fixture in Rodeo's life until he could hardly remember life without her. Together they stole naps on the sofa, they ate standing side by side, and she grew terribly good at his favorite game, (You want it, I have it) until she could win almost every time. They had their spatz, what couple doesn't? And if Rodeo's chewy bone seemed more tasty at the time- or Judy-pet's favorite squeaky bunny just happened to be the first toy Rodeo picked up- what of it?
Suddenly, one day Judy-pet fell sick, and the family took her away. Rodeo realized then, that his feelings for Judy-pet had blossomed into love. Sadly, when she returned, his cruel family, instead of letting him rush to her side, chose to part them. Mournfully he called to her through the bars of his cell (true, it was a large cell where they prepared the food, but what is food compared to love?) and Judy-pet came hobbling to join him.
And through the bars they confessed their mutual love.
"They have separated us forever, though," moaned Rodeo.
"There is only one thing left to do," declared Judy-pet.
"What is that?" asked Rodeo, tenderly licking her ear.
"We must eat poisoned treats so that we might be joined in death."
Rodeo shook his head sceptically. "No good," he said, "I ate lily bulbs as a puppy, if that didn't kill me nothing will."
"Then we are lost to each other!" cried Judy-pet, and throwing back her head she howled out her misery. Then she turned and limped back to her bed.
Rodeo lay down and sadly gazed after her, moaning out his heartbreak until at last sleep claimed him.
When morning came at last, Rodeo was awoken by the sound of Judy-pet's jewelery tinkling merrily as she pranced out of bed.
"Judy-pet!" cried Rodeo, "You're better!"
She stopped and considered for a moment. "I do feel better!" she declared.
Suddenly, Oh Great Joy! Rodeo's cell was opened and he bounded to her side. "We are together at last!" and he bayed his joy to the skies.
"Quiet down, you big furball," laughed Judy-pet, and she licked him on the nose.
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| Judy-pet as the Princess and the Pea |
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| Rodeo feeling put-upon |
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